A lot of people have asked what my new career move is, and now that it’s starting to terrify me, its probably a good time to write about it and take a break from the whatifImnotgoodenoughtogetmarried spiel. During my last year of bachelors I focused on Film and Video production and fell in love the medium. I lie. I fell in love with film as a little girl, soaking up cop shows, soaking up horror movies, soaking up Afrikaans Drama, soaking up Hitchcock, Jaws, Bladerunner, Neverending Story, Spaghetti Westerns with exaggerated punching noises, Bill Murray movies, Il Postino, Joy Luck Club, Star Wars, Superman, Nightmare before Christmas, Batman, Marvin’s Room, Kenneth Branagh’s Shakespeare stint and Baz Luhrman’s frenetic Romeo and Juliet. I think I watched The Birds at age 5 and The Piano at age 12. My mom didn’t believe in censorship as long as the film/book was good. The world of possibility from the inside as a student just extended my love for creating and telling stories in a way that made the impossible possible. To this day, I get genuinely excited as the 20th Century Fox (1994) theme plays.
I have spent the last two years working as a production manager and occasionally directing, but I have always longed to have my hands in the creative process itself. The last time I edited video was at university (a long long long time ago) when we still had to transfer VHS and digital tapes to a workable format for adobe, but I loved it. My biggest frustration as a young theatrical director/scriptwriter was how little control one had over the rhythm and pace of moments. I was infamously hard to work with because I was such a Nazi about getting each moment just right, never allowing script changes for fear of losing the rhythmic thread. Editing allows one to tell 1001 angles of a story by chopping it up and reassembling it. You become both another character, narrator, director, and scriptwriter in one.
I am so infinitely grateful that in 2017 I am granted one of my childhood dreams. I will start training as a junior editor with one of my creative heroes and friends, just 3km’s away from home. I think most people will have a few anxious moments over whether they’ll make it once someone gives them a shot, but I’m not nearly afraid enough to quit. This risk is well worth the potential face-plant.
For someone who struggles with overcoming fear, I have a surprisingly optimistic view of risk-taking, but out of all the risks I’ve taken in my life, I have almost never walked out of them poorer or less than I was going in. Moving to Ulleungdo was a huge risk. For one, the DPRK were firing missiles over our heads, I was living in semi-disputed territory and I was in a very secluded life in a culture that was both different from my western one and also different from mainland Korea. Yet, I never experienced a moment that I was not utterly grateful to be there, and I almost always tear up with homesickness when I recall it now.
There are, obviously, unwise and damaging risks to take, but exiting our comfort provides opportunity where we grab hold of God, as our sole provider, for more than a mere moment. It is the seasons in which we are honest with ourselves about how little we can do for ourselves and we remember what it was like to be a child, where every wobbly step we took presented the risk of falling, but we clung on to Quackie and braved the way excitedly, no matter how treacherous the terrain.
Speaking of Risks, and movies, watch this video from Every Frame a Painting (actually just subscribe and check out ALL their videos) by clicking HERE.
Hans Zimmer Compilation play here